Brian's bicycle

Would u punish your child for lying?

Toddlers who lie 'will do better'

Researchers said most children lied

Toddlers who tell lies early on are more likely to do well later, researchers claim.

The complex brain processes involved in formulating a lie are an indicator of a child's early intelligence, they add.

A Canadian study of 1,200 children aged two to 17 suggests those who are able to lie have reached an important developmental stage.

Only a fifth of two-year-olds tested in the study were able to lie.

But at age four, 90% were capable of lying, the study found. The rate increases with age to a peak at age 12.

'Developmental milestone'

The director of the Institute of Child Study at Toronto University, Dr Kang Lee, said: "Parents should not be alarmed if their child tells a fib.

"Their children are not going to turn out to be pathological liars. Almost all children lie.

"It is a sign that they have reached a new developmental milestone.

"Those who have better cognitive development lie because they can cover up their tracks."

This was because they had developed the ability to carry out a complex juggling act which involves keeping the truth at the back of their brains.

He added: "They even make bankers in later life."

Dr Kang tested the children's honesty by telling them not to peek at a toy placed behind their backs while leaving the room.

He then monitored their reactions by video and returned to ask if they had turned around, checking their responses against the recording.

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Page last updated at 10:55 GMT, Monday, 17 May 2010 11:55 UK

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/education/10119297.stm

how good a mother am i, i wonder...?!

i sub-con my son to my babysitter - Full-time!!

i hv been toying with the idea for a long time, and have been weighing this and that, i still clung onto taking him back home at nite, at least 4 nights in a week....

guess his reluctance to drink milk during our care, until today, is the 'last straw that broke the camel's back', so to speak.

with heavy hearts, we sent him to babysitter last nite.

Lessons for us, for sake of our children

Book: How to Win Friends and Influence People
- by Dale Carnegie

The gist of the book says:

Fundamental Techniques in Handling People

1. Don’t criticize, condemn or complain.
2. Give honest and sincere appreciation.
3. Arouse in the other person an eager want.

Six Ways to Make People Like You

1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
2. Smile.
3. Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.
4. Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.
5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.
6. Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Win People to Your Way of Thinking

1. The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
2. Show respect for the other person’s opinions. Never say, “You’re wrong.”
3. If you are wrong, admit it quickly and emphatically.
4. Begin in a friendly way.
5. Get the other person saying “yes, yes” immediately.
6. Let the other person do a great deal of the talking.
7. Let the other person feel that the idea is his or hers.
8. Try honestly to see things from the other person’s point of view.
9. Be sympathetic with the other person’s ideas and desires.
10. Appeal to the nobler motives.
11. Dramatize your ideas.
12. Throw down a challenge.

Be a Leader: How to Change People Without Giving Offense or Arousing Resentment

1. Begin with praise and honest appreciation.
2. Call attention to people’s mistakes indirectly.
3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
4. Ask questions instead of giving direct orders.
5. Let the other person save face.
6. Praise the slightest improvement and praise every improvement. Be “hearty in your approbation and lavish in your praise.”
7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
8. Use encouragement. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

In my first reaction, these are useful tips for enhancing our social life and career. But thinking further, it is equally useful to be practiced at home - on our children.

Children - if treated well and guided properly, will be good and admirable persons whom others will look up to, someday, when they come of age. We can and should help bring the BEST out of them.